YOU are faithful

relistening to the steven curtis chapman cd - beauty will rise... i won't go into the full story behind the cd - if you know much about christian music you have heard the story - sweet daughter killed in tragic accident...

today i heard this song again - and it brought out so many feelings ---

i am beginning to grieve the possible upcoming seperation from bubba...

it's hard b/c i don't want to focus on it - but if i ignore it and live in denial it will be even harder if he leaves.

part of it is getting laundry done - sounds so odd to say, but i HATE laundry and very rarely am caught up. now i am trying to go through all the boys' clothes and be sure they are clean so i am not doing laundry late into the night prior to sending him off. in fact we could get VERY short notice (few hours)... so would rather do it now in a calm way than in a spastic crying snotrunning way.

also, as it goes every year at this time... the thoughts of loss surrounding bee's birthday are coming up...

5 years ago... it's crazy! we are just shy of two weeks from his birthday - we will be at a wedding this year (love distractions) but i know i will grieve as i always do... and this milestone bday already makes me a bit weepy...

i love the lyrics of this song b/c it centers me back...

with all this sad sack stuff - i know GOD is in control and HE has a plan...


LYRICS TO YOU ARE FAITHFUL - STEVEN CURTIS CHAPMAN
[ From: http://www.metrolyrics.com/faithful-lyrics-steven-curtis-chapman.html ]

I am broken, I am bleeding,

I'm scared and I'm confused,
but You are faithful.

Yes You are faithful.

I am weary, unbelieving.
God please help my unbelief!
Cuz You are faithful.

Yes You are faithful.

I will proclaim it to the world.
I will declare it to my heart
And sing it when the sun is shining.
I will scream it in the dark.

You are faithful!
You are faithful!

When you give and when You take away,
even then still Your name
is faithful!

You are faithful!

And with everything inside of me,
I am choosing to believe
You are faithful.

I am waiting for the rescue
that I know is sure to come,
cuz You are faithful.

Yes You are faithful.

I've dropped anchor in Your promises,
and I am holding on,
cuz You are faithful.

God You are faithful.

I will proclaim it to the world.
I will declare it to my heart
And sing it when the sun is shining.
I will scream it in the dark.

You are faithful!
You are faithful!

When you give and when You take away,
even then still Your name
is faithful!

You are faithful!

And with everything inside of me,
I am choosing to believe You're faithful.
So faithful...

Though I cannot have the answer
that I'm wanting to demand,
I'll remember You are God
and everything is in Your hand.
In Your hands you hold the sun, the moon,
the stars up in the sky,
for the sake of Love, You hung Your own Son
on the cross...to die...

You are faithful...

Yes, You are faithful...

When you give and when You take away,
even then, great is Your faithfulness!
Great is Your faithfulness!
And with everything inside of me,
I am choosing to believe You're faithful!

Oh, oh, oh...

Oh, oh, oh...

When you give and when You take away,
even then still Your name
is faithful!

You are faithful!

And with everything inside of me,
I am choosing to believe...
...You're faithful...