a lesson that shouldn't be taught

i know racism is learned


i hate it, i've heard my younger cousins use words that make my stomach turn... but they were 10ish... young but an "older" young...

we had brother bear in the van over baby bear's bday weekend

our neighborhood is culturally diverse... and as we drove down the street there was a young black man walking on the sidewalk. he didn't look sketchy, just a guy walking in his own neighborhood... and from the back of the van i could sense brother bear's attention perking up... he said... mommy mommy... that's a... a... it's a bad word.

i said, yes brother that would be a bad word.

even though the word was never spoken it broke my heart that this young 5 year old knew that word.

then... further breaking my heart... mommy - he's a bad man.

this child does not know this man from adam, we live in an area far from his foster parents and far from his bio-family.

my answer.... "brother, you don't know that man, you don't know he's a bad man. just because he's black does not mean he is bad."

silence

"do you know white people who have made bad choices?"

brother - yes...

"just because someone makes bad choices doesn't make them bad.... and choices can be made by anyone no matter what color they are.... right?"

brother - yes mommy...

"people who have made bad choices, they can work on making better choices. we can pray for them to make good choices"

brother... can we play on the swing...

moment gone... but hopefully lesson learned...

sigh

Racism

Really thought that I would be able to spot racism.

I had thought the racism in my family was limited more towards the older men.

Today on facebook I saw this post from a close relative younger than myself...

Minorities, can't live with them. Can't live with them. No, really you can't live a fulfilling life with them around.

I sent him a quick message - reminding him that there is a chance that my next child could be a minority. I reminded him half his posts are about Jesus. He is an intense Christian. These things don't mesh.

I am heartbroken, confused, and not sure what this means for our relationship down the road. I have a feeling it'll mean less and less contact. If he can't see the error of his way I have no choice. I will not expose my children to such ignorance.

Very sad.