it has been a rough week and a half...
i find myself listening to a sermon, bible study, teaching, working with my students, looking out at the class, looking at my cousin's newborn, thinking about visiting the newborn... and all of a sudden my eyes are wet.
i'm not sobbing, i'm not even crying - but tears are swimming
the sermon today was fabulous - Commentary on Revelations Chp 4. Not scary at all - the pastor centered the discussion around the visual of the throne and how it is representative of GOD being present and in control.
the combination of the unexpected death of one of my students and the continued longing for another child have combined and the result has been more than the sum of the parts
i breathe through the moments and continually remind myself HE is in control - i may not see the short term reasons ---- i already see how he is working in the lives of others students through the passing of one of their closest friends...
it is still difficult... and i have a feeling it'll be a continual battle with wet eyes